Listen to the Voices
by Tiro
Summary: Gojyo gets poisoned, and he’s dying. Who’s going to help him? Final chapter up.
1. Chapter 1

**Listen to the Voices**

**Summary**: Gojyo gets poisoned, and he's dying. Who's going to help him?

**Pairing/s**: None.

**Warnings**: Not much, a bit of blood.

**Disclaimers**: I don't own Saiyuki, never will own Saiyuki.

-

**Chapter One**

Rain always soothed Gojyo. It fell gently onto the ground, giving life back to earth and breathing new life into the hanyou. Of course, he kept himself away from Sanzo and Hakkai when to enjoy the rain since they both hated it. Goku was always left alone with them, even though he would whine to the redhead he wanted to go. He was never allowed to because Gojyo did not want anyone to know about this little secret of his.

Rain also washed away blood. When Gojyo was little, really little, he always thought if he stayed in the rain long enough, the red hair-colour would come off and reveal brown just like Jien's and mom's. It never did. He knew this today, because he was no fool but still loved the rain. It kept bad memories on bay, and he took every chance to get rid of them.

He was not aware he had come so far away from town before he found himself in a meadow of flowers. He crunched down, his hair hanging limply around his face and his clothes soaked. He cradled a snow-white flower in his hand without plucking it and sighed softly. He moved his other hand over the others.

A small sting made him draw back, and his vision blurred. He looked at his hand, saw the small mark and could only think:

'Oh, shit…'

He got up, dizzily and began getting back to town. This was not good, not good at all. If it was the same as before, he was in deep shit, really deep shit... He stumbled as it spread like fire in his veins, constant fire burning inside of him, just like _she _had described it. Oh, he had not thought of _her_ for a very long time. Maybe that was why he was careless, too careless, too stupid... he should know better.

His legs gave out but he bit his lip, kept the screm inside, and dragged himself up. His body was numb and cold, but not because of the rain. Soon, if he was really unlucky, the rain would have been a welcome to the fire-hot skin of his. His vision vanished for a moment and then it happened.

With a thud, his body fell to the ground.

-

Hakkai never liked the rain. It reminded him too much of Kanan. The rain made his scar ache, and his mood to sink. He had never missed Gojyo's near-smile every time it rained, but he knew it was not because of malice. Gojyo apparently had some good memories of rain since the time when he was a child, so the human turned youkai let his friend have that. Gojyo had enough of bad memories to last for a life-time.

They all had. Hakkai looked over at Sanzo, and saw him smoking yet another cigarette. Sanzo never liked the rain either, but the youkai had never been suicidal enough to ask why. Goku liked the rain, but he never said so. He just sat there, with them, and never complained. Never aloud anyway when he was with them; Hakkai was sure the boy had complained enough to Gojyo.

They were currently in a very luxury inn, where they had a small house for themselves. Two double-beds in the living room, a kitchen and a shower along with a toilet. They had come to this inn because it had been raining for several days and they finally had to stop somewhere until it let up.

Hakuryuu was lying on one of the beds, snoozing quietly.

But they were all startled when it was a bang on the door. It sounded like a body had collapsed against it.

"Open, monkey," Sanzo muttered.

"Not a monkey," Goku protested but went up. Hakkai looked back out the window but whipped his head back when the young youkai screamed: "Gojyo!"

Sanzo turned as well, and the sight shocked them. Gojyo had fallen inside when Goku opened the door, soaked to the bone. His left arm was completely bloodless, and his eyes were rolled back. Hakkai saw his teeth were stained with blood. The healer in the youkai woke up and Hakkai rushed over.

"Gojyo?" he said, gently slapping his friend's cheek.

There was no response.

"Let's get him inside," Hakkai said to the young man. "Sanzo, can you get some towels?"

The priest scowled, but obeyed. He glanced a moment too long at Gojyo, and Hakkai smiled softly. The human had a soft spot for them all, even if he flat-out denied that. Goku shut the door after them and they settled the hanyou down onto the floor. Sanzo threw the towels down and Hakkai began drying off his friend. Suddenly there was a response, but not what they had expected.

Gojyo screamed and gripped his left arm. His blood-curling scream even made Sanzo jump and they saw as he curled up and clutched the bloodless arm.

"Gojyo, tell me where it hurts," Hakkai tried, rubbing in healing qi to ease his friend's discomfort.

"P-p… po—" Another scream cut off whatever Gojyo was saying and this time he bent upwards, almost so his spine snapped. Hakkai pushed the hanyou down by pressing his hand on Gojyo's chest, looking at Goku and Sanzo for help. Even the priest moved closer.

"Bring me a dry set of Gojyo's clothes," the green-eyed man told Sanzo. "Goku, hold him down while I'll take a look at his arm."

It was easier said than done. Gojyo had no intention staying down so the young man almost had to lie on him, using all of his strength to keep him down. Hakkai took the left arm in his arms and Gojyo let out another blood-hurling scream, trying to pull his arm back. Hakkai rubbed in some healing qi and the redhead relaxed slightly, letting the man work quietly for a few minutes.

"What happened?" Sanzo's voice startled the healer a bit, and Hakkai looked up at the human. He had a pair of Gojyo's jeans and a shirt under his arm.

"I think it's poison due to the condition of his arm," Hakkai said. "I can't find another cause, but what poison would do this?"

"We have to make him talk about what happened," Goku said, struggling with keeping Gojyo down.

They succeeded drying and redressing the hanyou within a few minutes and together they heaved him into a bed, his limbs flying around in feverish defence.

"Gojyo," Hakkai said gently, stroking back the red curtain of hair from the man's face. Gojyo stilled somewhat, recognizing his friend's voice. "What happened?"

"Poi… son…"

"We know it's poison," Hakkai said gently, stroking the hair.

"Poison," Gojyo wheezed, "flower… got stung by poison… flow---" Another wave of pain hit him and his eyes rolled back as his mouth opened in a silent scream. They saw to their horror blood bubbled up from his throat, and Hakkai quickly rolled him to his side. The blood splattered onto the floor and the brunette gently rubbed his friend's back as Gojyo coughed.

"Gojyo? Please tell me where you were when you got stung."

Gojyo's bloodshot eyes found green ones, one fake and one real.

"Meadow," he heaved out. "Meadow outs-side t-town…"

"Good, that's all I need to know for now," Hakkai said. "Please take deep breaths. Try to breathe calmly."

Blood came pouring out from the redhead's nose, and the man screamed.

"Sanzo, grab his legs! Goku, please get me some more towels and a bowel of water!"

The boy ran to get the items, and the priest forced the legs still. Hakkai stroke the man's back, whispering softly to him and rubbing some warming qi into him. Gojyo coughed a bit but no blood. Goku came back and Hakkai wetted a towel. He cleaned Gojyo's face, and the redhead just lay there, staring up at the ceiling. His face was pretty much white now, and it was dried blood around his mouth and nose. They slowly released him but Gojyo did not make another move. He seemed too drained. His breathes came fast and Hakkai had to calm him down.

"I need to get to that meadow," Hakkai said, "if we're going to save him."

"I'll go with you!" Goku said.

"Sanzo, can you stay with him?"

"Whatever," the human said, looking away.

"Thank you," the green-eyed man said and leaned down again. "Gojyo? Gojyo, can you hear me?"

The hanyou's tired eyes looked at Hakkai for a moment before slipping close again.

"Good," the human turned youkai said. "Gojyo, we're going to the meadow, me and Goku. Sanzo will be here, okay?"

Gojyo coughed as a reply and Hakkai slowly slid the man over to his side.

"Take care of him," Hakkai said to the priest. Sanzo just nodded. "Come on then, Goku."

"Hakkai…"

They turned to look at Gojyo. His eyes were glazed over but he still continued to speak:

"Don't touch… the flowers… just in case…"

"Which flowers?"

"They have sharp twigs…" Gojyo panted out. "They are… red… blood red…"

"Alright," Hakkai said. "We won't touch them. They are the flowers we are supposed to look after?"

The hanyou succeeded with an exhausted nod before he seemed to loose consciousness. The two youkais soon left, leaving the priest alone with the redheaded half-breed. Sanzo looked at Gojyo and sneered.

"Why the hell did you have to get yourself in trouble for?" he asked. Gojyo never noticed. "Che."

-

Sanzo was awoken by a scream. He sat up, startled, and looked over to the bed. Gojyo was thrashing around, blood coming out his mouth. Sanzo stilled him, with great effort, and held the hanyou's head secure. It was an awkward position, and Gojyo was nearly hugged by the priest. But he went limp as soon as he felt the arms around him, although it was almost only his head, and Sanzo sighed. One hand cradled Gojyo's skull and he was surprised to find the hair so soft. At least the man was quiet.

He sat like that for a while, until he realized he was stroking the hair slowly and that Gojyo had fallen asleep, the hot skin making Sanzo's chest feel like it was on fire. He scowled but did not push Gojyo back. Instead he slowly lowered the redheaded man onto the mattress and drew the sheets over his body as he himself moved away. Gojyo moved a bit but then he was still. His face was pale by now and Sanzo saw the paleness was creeping towards his other arm and down his chest.

"Where the hell are you, Hakkai?"

-

Hakkai had found the flower, but he had no idea what it was. He did not dare touching it, and Goku had not touched it either.

"What are we supposed to do?" the smaller of them asked. "Gojyo's dying and we can't help him!"

Hakkai looked at the flower, trying to find some clue. But there was no chance he could come up with an antidote within the time-span Gojyo had left to live.

-

Sanzo had to hold Gojyo down again. The man was thrashing around, clawing at his skin and trying to get up. But the priest pulled him down, wetted a towel and placed it over Gojyo's forehead. Gojyo howled at the cold touch, but the blonde man just held him.

It was strange hugging the hanyou so close, but Sanzo had learned just within a few hours that Gojyo relaxed when he heard another person's heartbeat and felt someone's touch. Therefore, Sanzo had let the redhead rest his head against his own chest so the hanyou could feel the priest's heart.

"Hurry up, Hakkai," he hissed as he listened to Gojyo's laboured breathing.

"Jien…"

The whisper took Sanzo by surprise. Jien? That was Dokugakiji's old name. Why was Gojyo calling for him?

-

Dokugakuji looked around the landscape. Kougaiji called out:

"What are you doing?"

"Yeah, come on!" Lirin continued. "I'm starving!"

"_Jien…"_

The small voice made them all stop. Dokugakuji spun around, his eyes wide. Slowly a shape began to form in front of them, and Dokugakuji said uncertainly:

"Gojyo?"

A small boy stood in front of him. Red hair, red eyes. Painful look, white skin. The youkai felt his blood freeze.

"Who's that?" Lirin asked.

"_Jien,"_ the pathetic-looking boy whispered between cracked lips. Blood began to trickle down his mouth and nose. A small hand reached out for the big youkai. _"Jien… help me."_

Dokugakuji looked at the small boy, his eyes wide and his body rigid.

_Not again_…

He was not going to let Gojyo be in that kind of pain ever again.

Tbc…

* * *

The earliest work of Saiyuki I ever made, but it took a hell of a long time before I even considered digging it up and posting it.

Chapter two: In what way? Again? Has this happened to Gojyo before? Where, when and how?

Until later,

Ja,

Tiro


	2. Chapter 2

**Listen to the Voices**

**Summary**: Gojyo gets poisoned, and he's dying. Who's going to help him?

**Pairing/s**: None.

**Warnings**: Not much, a bit of blood.

**Disclaimers**: I don't own Saiyuki, never will own Saiyuki.

-

**Chapter**** Two**

"Stay still, silly, or I won't be able to clean it!"

Sha Gojyo, seven years old, bit his lip but let his older brother, Jien, work. The youkai dabbed the wound with water and heard his little brother hiss in pain.

"It's okay," he said and looked up at the redheaded boy. "Just a scratch."

"A big scratch!" Gojyo reminded. "Big! And it hurts!"

"Alright you cry-baby!"

"Not a cry-baby!" Gojyo protested.

"Yeah right," Jien huffed. "See? All clean. Let me put a bandage over it and we'll go home."

The small body stiffened and Gojyo looked down.

"Relax," the older one said, "mom's asleep."

"What if she's awake when we get back?" the small boy asked, his voice betraying his fear.

"Then it's still okay. I won't let her hurt you."

Gojyo looked on as Jien wrapped the bandage around the wound and then rocking back on his heels so he would get up.

"Ready to go home?" Jien asked.

"Not really," Gojyo said but took his brother's hand anyway.

-

"Why can't I follow with you?"

"Because where I work it's dangerous," Jien explained. "So I don't want you there when it's dangerous. Next week we will stop building; then you can come."

"And what am I supposed to do today?"

"Don't go into town, okay? You have enough bruises as it is," the older one said. "You got lunch packed down, so why don't you go to the meadow outside town? No one's there anyway."

Gojyo pouted but did as his brother said. He waved goodbye as Jien went for the town while he himself went to the meadow.

Once he came there, the boy looked around and wondered what to do. He could not really do anything but sit there. He sighed and sat down by one of the trees and put down the packed lunch. He pulled his legs to his chest and wound his arms around them. And there he sat for a long time, looking at the flowers swaying gently with the breeze, all colours mixed together.

He ate his lunch and after that got up to look more closely at the flowers. He went around and picked some of them into a bouquet. He was not sure he was going to give it to, but at least he had something to do.

Then he came to a blood red flower. He crunched down to look at it. It was beautiful but had sharp twigs. The flower had the same colour as his hair. His mom did not like that colour, but he knew Jien did. Maybe he could give Jien the blood red flower. Gojyo wondered if he could avoid getting cut and reached out.

No such luck.

"Ouch!" He put his stung finger in his mouth and glared at the flower. But a moment later his vision blurred and he fell back on his bum. He tried to get up but his legs would not hold him up. He fell down again and this time could not do anything but lie there. Darkness began to edge into his vision, even though Gojyo knew his eyes were wide-open. He tried to speak; nothing but a gurgle came out from his mouth.

What was going on?

-

Jien came home late that day and hoped Gojyo was still okay. He opened the door and got inside.

"Gojyo? Mom?"

A woman ran into him and hugged him hard.

"Oh, Jien!" she cried out. "You were gone for so long, mommy thought you had left me!"

"It's okay, mom," he said and pried her off gently. "Where is Gojyo?"

"That horrible boy hasn't come back!" she shouted in glee, her eyes crazy. "Maybe he's gone for good!"

Jien grew cold. Had something happened? Had someone found Gojyo? He led her over to the kitchen and made her sit down on a chair before lying right through his teeth:

"Mom, I forgot to shop food. You can go and rest some while I do that, okay?"

"You will come back soon?" Her voice was hopeful; he knew what she wanted. Something he hated to do.

"Of course," he lied. However, he had no intention to go back until he found his little brother.

-

Gojyo felt pain, a lot of pain. His limbs were heavy and his vision blurred. He was sure it was blood he tasted in his mouth. He had no idea what was going on; all he knew it was painful and he wanted it to stop.

His frail body had no strength to get up. He had only succeeded to turn to his side, knowing if he turned to his back he could choke on his blood or something else. His side was much better; everything just poured out of his mouth instead.

He closed his eyes; his vision had returned but he could hardly see anything. It was all blurry and the colours swam together when he had had his eyes open for too long. His body gave out a spasm of pain but he only managed a small whine. His vocal cords were dry, and it hurt to scream.

He heard something suddenly. A voice perhaps. What was a person doing out here? Was it still day and some kids decided to come here after all? He hoped not, because he would not be able to put up with a fight.

The voice sounded again. it did not belong to a child; it belonged to someone older. Gojyo opened his eyes again and looked around, the best he could. His eyes widened as he took in the blurry, orange sky; the sun was going down! He had been here for hours!

"Gojyo!"

_Jien_. It was Jien. Gojyo tried to get up but the pain was too much and this time a scream forced its way through his cracked and bloodied lips.

-

When Jien heard the scream, he began to run. His mind spun with different scenarios, none too pleasant. He wished Gojyo was not being beaten again; he could not stand to watch his little brother on the ground, being hit for something he could not help.

What he saw once he came to the meadow was not much better.

Gojyo's skin was white, a strong contrast to his normally light-tan skin, and his eyes wide-open but glassy, almost like he had a fever. Blood was coming out from his mouth and he seemed to be in a great deal of pain. From his mouth came the most horrifying scream the teen had ever heard. Jien had never run that fast before in his life.

-

Gojyo felt himself being lifted into strong arms and his head against a strong chest. His scream died down and he whimpered.

"Gojyo? Can you hear me?"

"J-Jien?" His voice was cracked, and he felt it was a wonder he could even speak.

"Yes, it's me. What happened?"

Gojyo finally succeeded to look at his brother.

"St-stung," he got out. "Stung by… some kind o-of… flower."

"Flower?"

Gojyo nodded and tried to bring his hand up to show his brother the mark. He did not succeed but Jien caught what he wanted to show. He took the small hand and examined it.

The mark was a bit red. Jien swore; most likely poison. But he had no idea how to remove poison. Who was going to help him?"

-

"You are lucky I was home today."

Jien nodded fervently as the woman moved around her cauldron. She then stepped over to Gojyo, her walking brisk and her face showing her worry.

She took the small hand in her own two hands and stroke a finger along the mark. Gojyo whined in pain, his body giving a spasm. She checked his body and said:

"It's fast-spreading but it might be because he's so small. Most of his body is affected, so he won't last much longer. I will draw some of his blood."

Jien nodded again, unsure what to do. The woman turned to him and said:

"You will help me with the antidote, boy. Okay?"

"Yes. Anything."

"Alright, I've already heated water up. I will tell you what I need and you will get it for me."

He nodded for the third time, his heart beating fast. They were in the outskirts of the town with a youkai healer, or that was some people called her. They had never seen her looking like a youkai but it seemed easy just to dismiss her as a youkai. Not many trusted her, so she spent most days being away. Today she had been home. Jien was not sure what he would have done if she had been gone; probably walked home with a dead child in his arms.

He woke up again once she walked back to her working table with a vial of Gojyo's blood. She poured it into a small cauldron and then placed a hand over it, her bracelets jingling. Jien watched her as strings of strange words came from her mouth. Her hair was a wild, black nest and the colour of her eyes he could not make out because of the light. She was not that old, maybe in her thirties but many called her the old witch. A glowing appeared around her hand and the youkai looked closer at it; the light was fascinating and he had no idea what she was doing.

She removed her hand after a while and the glowing disappeared.

"I know the poison," she said. "It comes from a certain type of flowers, called the Flowers of Blood because of their colour. The poison spreads and leaves the skin white. Sometimes the poisoned people vomit blood or it can even come out from the nose."

"Is it painful?" he asked.

"Imagine your veins are on fire," she said and looked over at the small boy. "Constantly. There is nothing to hold the pain away, unless you get a fever because of the poison. Your brother does not have a fever, although the body is too warm, but the pain is to be preferred before the fever."

"Why?"

"The fever kills you. The pain keeps you here."

Jien looked over at his brother and was startled when she spoke again:

"He has a few more hours. I will be able to finish the antidote within that limit, so help me now."

Jien looked at her, and nodded. She looked down for a moment and then said:

"Bring me a jar of crushed belladonna, and then the pack of leaves on the top shelf."

-

Jien was surprised to see the antidote was made of things you could find almost anywhere. The healer had explained to him this was how she made antidotes and she seemed to care little how others made theirs.

Mother Nature, she said, brought poisons to earth within harmless things and therefore the cure is to be found in other harmless things. If a poison is within a flower, seek the cure in other flowers, trees or bushes. She had worked hard to finally get the antidotes right, all through experimenting of what fit together. She now knew these antidotes by heart, and knew once she died they would be forgotten.

That was why she let Jien work with her, so he would be able to learn how she worked, and maybe, just maybe, tell someone other who picks her teaching up.

-

Gojyo was shivering on the bed he lay on. He felt like his lungs were on fire, and found it harder and harder to breath. Suddenly someone sat him up and his body protested. A cup was pressed against his mouth and a woman's voice said:

"Drink it, child. You will feel better."

He refused and closed his mouth; he knew far too well what could happen. His mother had tried to pour acid down his throat once; he was not up to drink something he did not know.

"Gojyo, she's right," his brother said quietly, gently, his strong arm supporting Gojyo's small body. "You will feel much better."

He could trust his brother, right? And Jien said he would feel better... Gojyo opened his mouth again after a little hesitation and swallowed the liquid. It had a rather funny taste but went down without any problems. Immediately his limbs grew heavy with sleep and his head lolled to the side once he finished drinking. He heard someone exhale loudly in relief but could not say if it was a man or a woman.

Before long, he was asleep.

Tbc…

* * *

Chapter three: Will Dokugakuji get to his little brother in time, and does he remember the strange healer's antidote?

Until later,

Ja,

Tiro


	3. Chapter 3

**Listen to the Voices**

**Summary**: Gojyo gets poisoned, and he's dying. Who's going to help him?

**Pairing/s**: None.

**Warnings**: Not much, a bit of blood.

**Disclaimers**: I don't own Saiyuki, will never own Saiyuki.

-

**Chapter**** Three**

Dokugakuji remembered running this fast only twice before in this life. The adrenalin climbing higher and higher, giving him more and more power; he had only felt it twice before.

On that day Gojyo had almost died; that had been the only time before Dokugakuji had run like his life depended on it. And today, he was running like that once more, the way he hoped he never had to do ever again.

-

Gojyo screamed and Hakkai held him down. He and Goku ad returned without anything, no solution, nothing. There was no one who could help them in the village. The owner to the inn suggested a strong sleeping pill so the redheaded man could at least die in peace. Hakkai had almost torn him to pieces for that comment.

"Hakkai," Goku said. "Maybe…"

"Don't say it," the healer growled out. "Just don't…"

Gojyo suddenly calmed down. Both of his arms, his head and the upper part of his torso had turned almost white and he was burning up. The hanyou looked at his friend with tired eyes and Hakkai feared what Gojyo would say. Would he say to let go? Would he actually ask of Hakkai to let him go, now when the human turned youkai was too afraid to let go?

"Why… do you look… so scared… Hakkai?" Gojyo asked and smiled gently. "It's okay…"

"No, Gojyo. it's not okay," Hakkai said, his voice almost cracking.

"It's okay," the redheaded man said drowsily. "He's here…"

"Who is here?" Sanzo asked.

Gojyo stretched out a hand towards the door, his eyes turning to look there.

"Jien," he whispered. "Jien…"

The door opened with a bang. They whipped their heads towards the door.

Dokugakuji leaned onto the door frame, panting. He was soaked to the bone, and looked exhausted. The three stared at him while Gojyo's smile turned wider. The youkai got through the door and closed it, turning the rain out.

"Is there a place where you can buy herbs and other things here?" he asked the three as he approached the bed.

"Yeah, I thought I saw one further down the street," Goku said, eyes wide.

"Why are you here?" Sanzo interrupted. "Is it for the sutra?"

"No," Dokugakuji said. "Once, long ago, I told Gojyo if he ever needed me he just had to call my name. I never fucking thought he actually would do it. Never mind that; we got other things to do. The poison seems to have spread rather slow but maybe not in the best place."

They stared at the youkai. How the hell did he know it was a poison?

Dokugakuji went to the bed and kneeled down. Out of respect, Hakkai drew back. The youkai touched his brother's forehead and said:

"Was it the flower, Gojyo?"

Their breaths caught. How much did he know about this? Gojyo nodded.

"Jien," the hanyou whispered.

"It's okay," the older brother said with a smile. "That healer maybe is dead now, but she taught me it. And for some reason, I've always remembered it."

"What did you always remember?" Hakkai asked.

"An antidote," Dokugakuji said. "I need to make it now, or else he will die."

-

Goku came back inside with a bag.

"They gave me all funny looks when I read up the list!" he whined.

"Maybe because it was rare ingredients and they did not know what you would do with them," Hakkai said and took the bag from him.

"No, the things on the list are normal!" Goku said. "Things you can find just a bit outside town."

Hakkai looked at the list as he moved to where the youkai was. True, it was normal things… surely you could not make an antidote with this?

"Will this work?" the healer asked the youkai as he gave the bag to Dokugakuji.

"If the poison comes from Mother Nature, beat it back with what she has created for us," Dokugakuji said and pulled the things out. "That's the simplest art of making antidotes."

"Who taught you that?"

"A healer from the town we lived in before," the older of them said as he heated the cauldron up. He had borrowed it from an elderly woman a bit away, since there was none in the inn. "I don't know if she's still alive. I doubt it."

"Could she have been a youkai, and been killed because she went crazy due to the Minus Wave?" Hakkai asked.

"No," he replied. "I'm sure she was killed long before that."

"Why would they kill a healer?" the human turned youkai asked, surprised.

"Because she was a monster to them," Dokugakuji said bitterly. "She did witchcraft according to them and healed people with strange herbs and drinks. What humans don't understand, they kill. Simple as that."

Gojyo howled in pain and Dokugakuji patted the younger man's leg. Surprisingly, the touch calmed the hanyou down. The youkai turned back to the herbs and plants in front of him. The three watched him.

He could hear her voice, ever calm, in the room. The smell of her house, her dark eyes shining in the firelight. Her gentle hands as she checked Gojyo while he slept, the skin slowly turning back to normal. The bracelets' jingle echoed in his ears. As she spoke the first ingredients, his eyes turned sharper and he plucked a package without looking.

The three watched the youkai work, almost as if he was listening to someone telling him what to do. Hakkai suddenly smelled something.

"Can you smell that?" he asked the others. Goku sniffed and then said:

"Old wood?"

"This place is new," the priest muttered.

"Smoke," Hakkai continued. "Stronger than it should be."

"_Mother Nature has a strange way telling us things, boy."_

The woman's voice startled them. Dokugakuji was not faced. Her voice haunted him even to this day.

"_As we never know that strange way, we fail to listen. Therefore we don't know anything about her. Sometimes I feel she's punishing us for not listening. Why else do we have this suffering? Why else does she trap death into beautiful creations as flowers? Why does she create a youkai who falls in love with a human, and makes a hanyou? She pushes that child into suffering, pain and hatred. Sometimes I feel… it __would be better if those children died in their mother's wombs."_

Dokugakuji had wondered why she had told him those things. Until he saw it. The roots of her hair was red. Blood red, like his brother. Her eyes, once he saw them in a better light, was so dark red so they could easily be passed as black in a bad light. She was like Gojyo; she was forbidden breed. She felt like Mother Nature was punishing her. Maybe that was why she always walked in the woods, listening to the earth; maybe she thought she would be forgiven then.

Gojyo had after the poisoning been in the woods a lot with that woman. As he came home he told Dokugakuji stories the woman hanyou had told the child. Once he had come home, scared and worried. Once Dokugakuji had asked him what happened, Gojyo had told him he heard voices… coming from the trees, from the ground and from the flowers.

Being so close to death, suffering what no one should suffer… it seemed like Gojyo had been forgiven. But now. He had lived a unhealthy life for a long time, ignoring the nature for years.

Maybe it was Mother Nature's way of reminding Gojyo how cruel she actually could, and would be when he did not listen to her.

-

The three were confused of the voice. It had quietened a little while ago, after the comment that hanyou children should die before they were born. Hakkai was shaking a bit; the woman had suggested Gojyo should never have been born. How dare she?!

"She didn't mean it that way," Dokugakuji said and looked up at Hakkai. The healer froze. "She meant it would mean less suffering for those children."

"But to even suggest it!" Hakkai said. "She was the one who saved Gojyo, wasn't it?!"

"I didn't see it at first," the youkai said as he let the antidote simmer for a little while. It was soon finished. Soon Gojyo would be at ease. "But when I looked closer, I saw it."

"Saw what?" Sanzo asked around his cigarette. He could not deny that this history interested him.

"Her eyes, I thought they were black at first," the oldest one of them said. "But then she stepped out in the sunlight with me. They were dark red. At first I thought she had black hair, but then I saw the roots. She had dyed it. Her hair was as red as Gojyo's. She was a hanyou, and knows what hanyous had to endure. That was why she said it would have been better if she had died before she was born. She was simply tired of the suffering."

He dropped in some leaves of some sort into the cauldron, waving the smoke away and continued:

"She tried to help Gojyo. She took him out while I was gone, made sure he was safe. He was so happy back then, when she was there. Then mother… never mind, that's long ago. After that, I ran away. I don't think Gojyo stayed very long."

"She told me… to go north."

The voice startled them all and they turned to Gojyo. His tired eyes sought out Dokugakuji.

"North?" the older asked quietly. Gojyo nodded. "Why?"

"In the north… people didn't care as much… if you were hanyou or not…"

"Why didn't she go there?"

"She was about to… when you came with me," Gojyo said, his breathing laboured. Dokugakuji had not the heart to ask him to stop, as it seemed Gojyo wanted this off his chest. "When she saw me… she changed her mind."

"Why didn't she go with you?" Dokugakuji asked and turned away from the antidote; it had to simmer for ten minutes before it was finished.

"The villagers… that year had been bad," the hanyou said. "For the crops… nothing had survived. They blamed hanyous… us two. She told me to run… and not look back."

"Gojyo?" Hakkai said as tears began to roll down from Gojyo's eyes.

"I looked back," Gojyo whispered, his pain increasing and the poison trying to make its way into his lungs. He was running out of time. "Just in time… to see them… kill her. They slaughtered her, like she was… nothing but an animal… and all she did… was to smile at me. She was right... she was always right... Hanyous are better off dead… right?"

"Gojyo, don't!"

The redheaded man smiled weakly before his eyes closed.

-

"_It's not your time yet, child. Go home. They are waiting for you."_

-

Gojyo opened his eyes. Hakkai's worried face stared down at him.

"Yo," Gojyo said weakly.

"Gojyo…"

The redhead sat up slowly, squinting at the strong sunlight.

"Do you remember what happened?" Hakkai asked.

"A bit," Gojyo said. "I was pretty out of it when I said that about hanyous are better off dead… or so I think."

Hakkai looked at the man for a long time. Then he gently embraced him. Gojyo was a bit surprised at first but then relaxed and said:

"Sorry. I got you worried this time, didn't I?"

"You scared me half to death," Hakkai whispered. "Don't ever do that again!"

"Yes, mother."

The healer laughed at that, and Gojyo could not help but chuckle.

"Dokugakuji was leaving soon he said," Hakkai said as he pulled back. "I'll send him in."

"Where are you guys?"

"Outside. Sanzo insisted of seeing the sun after, quoting, 'all the goddam rain'."

"Sounds like Sanzo alright."

Hakkai left and soon the youkai entered. Gojyo watched him as he sat down on the bed.

"What you said about her," Dokugakuji said carefully. "Was it true?"

"She's dead," Gojyo said. "Her corpse was displayed at the center of town."

"How do you know?"

"I saw it," Gojyo replied and looked away. "And on the night, don't ask me how I did it, I cut her down. I managed to drag it out of town but I wasn't strong enough to dig her a grave. So I burned her."

"Gojyo… I'm sorry."

"Don't say you're sorry," the redhead said as he looked at the sky outside. "It won't take back the years or undo any actions. It won't bring her back to life, or mom. They are both dead, and they're gonna stay dead. I tried to forget her, and everything she taught me. I got myself a nice reminder to never mess with Mother Nature."

"I guess so."

"I can hear them, you know," Gojyo said. "The voices. Even from inside this house, they whisper to me."

"What do they say?" Dokugakuji asked.

"Oh, this and that," Gojyo said. "It was them I heard, and maybe her, when I called on you. They told me to just shout your name. They would carry my voice to you. Did you hear me?"

The youkai looked at his little brother for a long time. Then he ruffled the red hair and said:

"Of course. How I'm supposed to be able to ignore my cute brother's call?"

"Don't call me that!"

Dokugakuji laughed. Somewhere, maybe in his own head he heard:

"_You did a good job, boy. You will make a superb healer one day, just as long as you listen to what Mother Nature tells you."_

He did not need to be able to hear Mother Nature; he could just listen to them. To the healer and to his brother. They knew what Mother Nature said, and maybe, just maybe, it was because of the fact that they were hanyous.

End

* * *

Hope you enjoyed it!

Until another time,

Ja,

Tiro


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